By John Fast
Copyright 2013
When it comes to the role of women in the church, there are two principle views.
One is known as the complementarian view, also known as the traditional or
hierarchical view. The other position is that held by evangelical feminists and
known as the egalitarian view. Of these two, the complementarian view is the
position supported by Scripture. God created men and women equal, but he also
created them different and intended them to fulfill different roles. God created the
man to be the head of the family; the husband, father, provider, protector, and
leader. God designed the woman as a helpmate suitable for the man (Gn 2:18). She
is to actively help and submit to the man’s leadership. One way in which she helps
is to remind her Christian husband of his God ordained role and encourages him to
fulfill it. But submission does not mean being a door mat. Paul is clear as to the
role of women in the church (Rm 16:1-2; 1 Tm 2:9-15; Tit 2:3-5). It is identical to
their role in the home. It is a role of helping, service, and submission, not teaching
and leadership.
Titus 2:3 is often misunderstood by many to grant a teaching role to women, and it
does, but the question is what are they to teach. Paul tells us. They are to be
“teaching what is good.” Well, what is good? Paul tells us in verses 4 and 5, “that
they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their
children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own
husbands,” and then Paul gives the reason young women are to be taught these
principles, “that the word of God may not be dishonored.” In essence the older
women in the church are to teach the younger women in the church what it means
to be a suitable helper. For the woman to step outside her God ordained role and
usurp the role of the man is to dishonor, or place a low value on God’s word. When
the role differences between men and women are properly understood and
practiced, they foster biblical manhood and womanhood and deeply enrich the life
of the family and the church. As the word “complementarian” suggests, the God
ordained roles of men and women complement each other, not compete.
This view is very unpopular today for several reasons. No one can deny that the
values which have been embraced by our culture have had a devastating impact on
the family. As Christians we expect to have our beliefs and the values and
principles taught in Scripture mocked, ridiculed, and opposed by the unbelieving
world. But it is especially shocking and demoralizing when key biblical principles
are ignored, ridiculed, and rejected by those who profess to be Christians and stand
for biblical truth. Perhaps no other foundational principle of Scripture has been
more universally ignored, redefined, and rejected, with shattering consequences for
the family and church than the principle of biblical male headship. This principle is
in immediate need of reclamation by those who profess to believe in the inerrancy,
authority, and sufficiency of Scripture and in the timeless nature of God’s
principles as taught in Scripture.
In the past 40 or 50 years we have witnessed the progressive feminization of our
culture along with a disdainful and mocking disregard for the biblical roles of men
and women. For the first time in American history women now outnumber men in
the work place. The wife is now the principle bread winner in more than one out of
five homes. More women than men now attend college. Some of the highest
political offices in our country are now held by women. Most people today would
consider this a good trend and laud it as a triumph for gender equality. But from a
biblical perspective it demonstrates how completely the biblical roles of men and
women have been rejected, and sometimes reversed, not only by society, but by a
large portion of professing Christians. Among unbelievers more and more men
and women are viewing marriage as an unnecessary burden, distraction, and
interference with the pursuit of their own individualistic career goals, opting rather
for a cohabitating relationship where there is no distinction in gender roles. For
women to pursue a career of worldly success, power, and influence is considered
infinitely superior and more personally rewarding than being a mere godly wife
and mother. The disdain which a person holds for the biblical role of women is
measured by their reaction when a woman says her goal is to be a godly wife and
mother. Such women are often met with the retort, “Is that all you want to be?”
Egalitarianism has replaced complementarianism in the culture, and this Cultural
Revolution has spilled over into the church. Within the church more and more
denominations and congregations are embracing female spiritual leadership, both
in the pulpit and in leadership roles within the church. This spirit of egalitarianism
is even reflected in how some churches have changed the programs they offer. For
instance, many churches have changed the name of their Mother’s Day Out
program to Parent’s Day Out. God established certain roles for men and women
within the family, the church, and in society, and when men and women fulfill
those biblical roles this creates harmony and joy within the home. These different
roles complement one another, not compete with each other. But when men
abdicate their God given role or women usurp the role of men; the family, church,
and society all pay the consequences. We need look no further for validation than
the state of the family today. God is not mocked. No society, church, or person can
violate God’s timeless principles with impunity. “Who has defied Him without
harm” (Job 9:4b)?
While we would expect to find opposition to the principle of male headship within
the culture, it is opposed just as vigorously within much of the professing church.
It is usually portrayed as the antiquated relic of a patriarchal, male-dominated
Middle-Eastern culture which is now outdated in our enlightened, modern,
pluralistic, egalitarian age. Paul’s instructions found in1 Timothy 2:9-15 regarding
the role of women in the church are usually dismissed as evidence of Paul’s own
male chauvinism, or as applying only to a specific situation within the church in
Ephesus. But the fact that Paul bases his teaching on the roles ordained by God in
creation (2:13, 14) and that his expressed purpose for writing to Timothy was “so
that you may know how one ought to conduct himself in the household of God”
(3:15), proves that his instructions regarding the role of women in the church are
based on God’s timeless, unchanging roles ordained in creation, and are to have
universal application within the church. But instead of embracing and submitting
to God’s prescriptions as His very best for us, we are told we need to rethink God’s
word in light of the values of our contemporary culture. To glibly dismiss God’s
principles because an egalitarian and feminized culture finds them unpalatable is
exegetically irresponsible and morally and spiritually rebellious.
The great tragedy inherent with this egalitarian rationalization is that it perpetuates
the same rebellion that infected the human race with sin. Man becomes the
ultimate determiner of what biblical principles are relevant or irrelevant, which are
to be obeyed and which can be ignored. Man is ultimate. This is paganism at its
core. Quite often the reason given for ignoring or denying God’s ordained roles for
men and women is the fact that many men have abused this principle. But a wrong
application of a principle does not give us the liberty to redefine God’s ordained
gender roles. You cannot correct disobedience by further disobedience; “evil will
not deliver those who practice it” (Eccl 8:8d). You correct disobedience with
obedience. Christian men need to learn what it means to be biblical men, husbands,
and fathers (1 Corinthians 16:13; Ephesians 5:25; 1 Peter 3:7), and Christian
women need to learn what it means to be biblical women, wives, and mothers
(Ephesians 5:22-24; 1 Timothy 2:9-15; Titus 2:3-5; 1 Peter 3:1-6).
Our culture instinctively views the biblical principle of male headship as
chauvinistic, archaic, Neanderthal, controlling, dictatorial, enslaving, demeaning,
and even emotionally abusive. This is not surprising since the Bible tells us the
world is fallen and darkened in its understanding (Eph. 2:1-3; 4:17-19), that it
suppresses the truth in unrighteousness (Rm 1:16), and to the unregenerate mind
God’s word is foolishness (1 Cor 2:14). The tragedy is that much of the professing
church shares the culture’s opinion when it comes to the biblically defined roles of
men and women. But God does not give a father and husband headship over his
wife and children, especially daughters (Nm 30), in order to dominate and control
them for his own selfish ends. That is not God’s character, and to insinuate
otherwise is not only to reject God’s roles for men and women, but to impugn the
character of God.
The Bible makes it clear that women are the weaker sex (1 Tm 2:9-15; 1 Pt 3:7),
and that children need guidance, discipline, and instruction (all of Prov; Eph 6:4;
Col 3:21). Women and children need to be protected, and children need to be
trained in godliness. Rather than being demeaning, this belief places a high value
on women and children. It is human nature for a person to guard and protect what
they highly value. They put their money in a bank, place their valuables in safety
deposit boxes, have home security systems, and take many other precautions to
guard what is precious to them. So how irrational is it for people to reject the very
principles God has given for the purpose of securing our ultimate welfare? Yet this
is precisely what our culture does on every level, but no more so than in its
rejection of God’s ordained roles for men and women. An egalitarian mindset
recoils in horror at God’s principles while at the same time denying and ignoring
the obvious truth that women are different from men biologically, emotionally, and
relationally.
The 19th century missionary to cannibals of the New Hebrides Islands in the South
Pacific, John G. Paton, noted this about a culture’s treatment of women, “Oh, how
sad and degraded is the position of women where the teaching of Christ is
unknown, or disregarded though known! It is the Christ of the Bible, it is His Spirit
entering into humanity that has lifted woman, and made her the helpmate and the
friend of man, not his toy or his slave.”
Far from elevating women, the philosophy of egalitarianism has succeeded in
producing a culture where women are no longer highly valued, honored, and
respected. What man today stands when a woman enters the room, or holds the
door and allows the woman to go first, or opens the car door for her, or is
concerned with protecting her virtue and reputation? These symbols of honor,
respect, esteem, and admiration are long forgotten, having been thoroughly
eradicated from our social consciousness. Instead immodesty is a virtue,
pornography has become mainstream, and women are viewed as little more than
the means of self-gratification. Fathers let their daughters dress like prostitutes.
Feminists have succeeded in winning for women the right to be treated no better
than men, to be as coarse, crude, and profane as men, to be treated as a competitor
instead of a companion, and to be exploited rather than nurtured. In short, feminists
have won women the right to be treated no differently than women have always
been treated where “the teaching of Christ is unknown, or disregarded though
known.” And we call this progress?
A Christian husband and father is not fooled by the false claims, empty promises,
and illusory privileges of egalitarianism, rather he self-sacrificially carries out his
God ordained responsibility before the Lord, even in the face of a hostile and
antagonistic culture. He has the faith and fortitude to defend the truth and stick to
his convictions. And a Christian woman finds her ultimate joy and satisfaction in
fulfilling the role God has instituted for her life.
God knows us better than we know ourselves, and the gender roles He has
instituted are the best possible for our ultimate welfare and the welfare of His
church. They are certainly better than those we might concoct for ourselves. When
men and women fulfill their respective God ordained roles this brings peace, joy,
and harmony to a marriage, family, and church, and society reaps the benefits.